I’ve drank four Buzz Cola’s and it’s made me compelled to think of who would in a street fight between hip-hop mogul’s Akon and T-Pain. It’s a totally random thought but I need to solve this burning question. *Wilmer Valderama voice* So Let’s BOOGIE!
Okay so T-Pain a.k.a. Faheem Najm (not that it matters but it was a wise move not going with the real name to make gold records) is at a club, which of course is a given because he sings about all aspects of clubs/strip joints. Let’s say Mr. Pain is at a club called “Smoozy’s,” in T-Pain’s hometown of Tallahassee. With it being in Nole country you can bet your bottom dollar that Jenn Sterger is around somewhere at Smoozy’s but that’s besides the point. Anyways, T-Pain is getting wasted off his ass.
As for Akon also known as the voice of ghetto, he is performing one of his many concerts in the area of Tallahassee. But at this concert, Akon isn’t gettin’ FREAKAY with any of the concert-goers.
So it’s around 2 a.m. T-Pain finally leaves “Smoozy’s” while driving something you would see in Dub Magazine. Akon around the same time packs up and leaves his concert and gets in his whip to go get somethin to eat with his entourage.
Both T-Pain and Akon are driving along I-10 and then all of sudden T-Pain loses control of the car and slams into Akon who happens to be driving near by. Wrecking both vehicles. Akon gets furious and yells out, “THIS DOES MATTER!!!!!! UNLIKE MY GOD FORSAKEN SONG THAT WAS PLAYED A MILLION TIMES ON LOCAL RADIOS! YOU ARE GONNA HAVE YOUR BALLS KICKED T-PAIN!!” T-Pain being wasted says “Imma buy u a drank Akon! That was a great song we did huh?” Akon proceeds to pull out a 2×4 out of his trunk and wacks T-Pain on the head. T-Pain surprisingly gets up from the blow and throws a bottle of cristal at the ghetto superstar. Akon gets even more pissed and the two go to blows on the Florida Freeway system.
Then…. Out of nowhere, Gwen Stefani gets out of the car to help out her boy Akon and gives Mr. T-Pain a vicious steamer that causes T-Pain to go unconscious. So in this vicious battle Akon comes out on top because he collaborates with so many celebs that they will always have his back. As for T-Pain he will stay in love wit’ strippers, and go hit on bartenders. Cheers!
*Note: All of this was completely fictious and came out of my ass for the most part.
